Newsweek

Update -- October 2007:  Apparently Newsweek has taken the article down off of the site since it's been more than 3 years.  (What were they THINKING? ;>) ) So attached is a copy of it.

Download newsweek_june_7_2004.doc

I've been getting a lot of requests from people who didn't get a chance to see the Newsweek article for a copy of it. Here's the link to the article at Newsweek on MSNBC: MSNBC - My Turn: I Was Scared That I Might Hurt My Baby.

If the link doesn't work, let me know and I'll send you a copy.  Here's an excerpt:

When my son was between 5 and 7 weeks old, it really hit me. One night while burping him with a burp cloth I wondered what would happen if I smothered him with it. (Writing that down is absolutely mortifying.) I remember being stunned by the thought. I began to have even more such thoughts, and I became extremely frightened. I thought about dropping him down the stairs. Or accidentally drowning him in the bathtub. I'd shake my head and think, I know I'd never hurt him. What's wrong with me?

I told no one what was happening. How could I expect anyone to understand? While the other new mothers I knew were off taking long, sunny stroller walks, I shared none of the serenity they seemed to enjoy. I was sure I had lost my mind and would be locked up forever. I became convinced that my son would never love me. I barely ate or slept, and I cried more and more. I became afraid to be alone with him, and begged my bewildered husband to come home every day for lunch.

Comments

[candace Martin]

I cannot thank you enough for sharing your story. It is inspirational. I read it and can't believe I was not alone in what I went through. Thank you.